Alcohol & Suffering

I woke up today really pissed at myself because I thought I was going to feel well enough to go back to the gym. You see, last weekend my doctor told me I had a respiratory infection. After asking me several questions, he concluded that maybe I need to take a break from alcohol (to help with my immune system) and smoky places (to help with my breathing). Did I listen? A little. I drastically cut back on my alcoholic intake (but I could have cut it out completely) and I still went to work at the club (instead of using my doctor's note). I'm officially an idiot and completely responsible for how shitty I feel. And then my day took a turn for the worse at lunch time.

I receive a call from one of my closest friends while I'm having lunch with my family. I ignore it cause answering would have been rude, but then I get a text from her telling me that I need to contact her ASAP. She always takes her time returning my calls so I figured I'll just finish lunch and then call her. If it was that important, she would have texted me what it was....right? Wrong. When I called her back, she was hysterical. I could tell she had been crying for a while. It was very difficult for her, but she went on to tell me that one of our friends had died last night in the hospital. And then my eyes started to water. He got into a major car accident because he had been drunk driving. Immediately I had a flashback of a conversation I had with my roommate when HIS friend died of a drug overdose last week. I gave him my condolences, but I made a comment (which now I realize was very disrespectful) that it must be a different kind of grieving because the person was somewhat responsible for their own death. I'm surprised he didn't punch me then cause if someone had said that to me today I don't know what kind of violence I'd be capable of. Grieving is grieving.

The nightlife industry is such a fucked-up atmosphere...I was one of the few people in my club that had never received a DUI. I'm not saying working at a club (my friend that died was a bartender at a different one) forced any of us to drink, but it definitely forged an environment where it was synonymous with fun. It would be different if we only had one or two drinks, but people in the industry go on binges....much worse than when I was in a fraternity in college. And this time, you can't just pass out at the party cause it's at a house. Don't worry, I'm not going to start preaching to you about the negative effects of alcohol because if you're like me you wouldn't listen until the day it hit close to home. Unfortunately...today was that day for me.